It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
