i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
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