8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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