He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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