i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
