we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
The feeling are messing with the penis
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
