You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
