This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Randomize
