Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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