i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I will be naked everywhere
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
