I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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