i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize