After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
