I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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