He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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