do herpes really smell.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Randomize
