what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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