is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
