I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
