I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
