Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
