Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
