What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
