And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
