Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
