the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
God I need to hump something, right now.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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