he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
You need a sexual gate keeper
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
