So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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