Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Just cropdusted the office
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
