Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
