I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Randomize
