it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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