Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Randomize
