if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
As shirtless as possible
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
