But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
