possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
i believe in u and ur pee
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