i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize