spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize