i already hear my dad disowning me
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
