Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
