I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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