oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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