my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
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