I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
