Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize