That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
