party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Randomize
