I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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