so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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