Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
