Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
