with your own penis?
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
