The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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